The Price of Leadership.

 I have heard many leaders say it can be lonely at the top. The road to success is often narrow and lonely. While there are many who enjoy the perks of being in the limelight, very few are able to bare the consequences of doing the right things. It is even harder on leaders when the right decisions are not the popular ones . Great leaders base their actions on how posterity will judge them and not scoring cheap points by satisfying only the present. Doing the right thing is not a talent, it is a choice every leader has to make. We make those choices  by first leading ourselves exceptionally before trying to lead others. When others see results in our lives they will follow without any reminders of positional authority over them. Great leaders have had causes that they believed in - the world celebrates Nelson Mandela today because he fought for a cause that he believed in and  was in prison for 27 years. Mother Theresa, a woman full of love for the less privileged made a huge impact in their lives.  Malala a young girl from Pakistan was shot and risked her life to promote freedom for other girls to be educated. Soldiers have given up their lives so that we can live freely today. For all the things we enjoy today, a  price had to be paid.
 What cause are you passionate about? Do you know that you can make a difference. You are a solution to your national, regional or local problems. Your ideas may help solve the problems facing the world today such as poverty,  food shortage, AIDS, energy crisis, financial instability. You dont have to wait for permission to start doing what you see in your mind and feel in your heart. Time is running out, the world needs you. There is something special about you that only you can offer.The only thing you cannot do is what you have not tried to do. You matter and you can make a difference.

We remember Nelson Mandela in our thoughts and prayers as he recovers.

I'll like to hear your thoughts and experiences.

A Tribute to the Victims of the Connecticut Shooting

A special tribute to the victims of the Connecticut shooting; 20 children and 6 adults lost their lives. They had holiday plans and their whole lives ahead of them but all that ended today. The country and Newtown community are rallying round to support the families who have lost their loved ones with their prayers and kindness. For the rest of us, remember today is what we have, tomorrow is a promise. It is important to make every moment count. Let go of any hurts or grievances you may have and live your life to the fullest. Forgiveness is a gift. It cannot be earned or deserved. It is a choice we have to make to give it. If it has to be earned, it would be called "for-selling" instead of "for-giving". Let us rebuild the broken bridges before its too late. My mum and I made up from a misunderstanding a day before she went to heaven. The last and beautiful memories I had of her keeps me going today and I couldn't have imagined it any other way. Pride and keeping grudges  are like bagage, so drop it. You can choose to give someone a second chance this holiday season.

Before its too late

Sam (not real name) was a friendly old man. He was probably in his sixties and always had so many stories of back in the day. Sam always stopped by my office to pick up our waste bin  and we usually had a 10 - 15 minute chat each time. A times I felt the pressure of work but I always reminded  myself that life is all about making a difference. If listening to Sam's repeated stories brought a smile to his face, I was not going to miss that opportunity. Recently, Sam told me he was retiring and he wanted to start a new life. Its been 2 weeks since I have seen Sam and its more obvious because our trash keeps piling and no one has come to get them.  We spoke to facilities about our predicament and we were told our bin should have been picked up once a week but Sam did it everyday because he had a friend in there. I was shocked. I didn't realize that Sam was doing more than what was expected of him. I started feeling guilty, I wished I had appreciated him more. Sam is gone and now I am discovering the vacuum he has left behind. I was swiftly comforted by the great conversations we had and life's counsel that Sam always gave me. I had appreciated Sam by listening to him and that had brought him back to our office without me even knowing  it made a difference to him. It dawned on me that this situation occurs in our professional and personal lives as well. Many times we are too busy meeting deadlines or networking that we forget to celebrate and appreciate our co-workers and loved ones. For some, the wake up call occurs when the individual says they are leaving. This prompts us telling them how wonderful they had been and how we valued their work. This is a good example of putting the cart before the horse. It's probable that they may have stayed, if we had valued them right from the beginning. Brains are like hearts they go where they are valued. People will never forget how you made them feel.  The world says you dont value something until you have lost it. I say, if you dont value something, you would loose it. Many people often walk away from a manager rather the company itself.  So, let the people in your sphere of influence know how much you value them before its too late.

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I'll be happy to hear your stories or experiences.

The Best Christmas Gift

Your  loved ones have already given you a list of potential things they would love for Christmas. I am guessing you are either relieved or overwhelmed depending on whether you have gotten your Christmas shopping done. Hopefully you dont overextend yourself by going into debt and using the first few months of the new year to recover. Our loved ones get over the gifts we give them pretty quickly and are always looking forward to the next one. This holiday season let us try to  appreciate  those we  spend most of our time with - colleagues at work. There is one gift that is not easily forgotten and will last forever in their hearts. It is the gift of love. I know you are loving by giving but you can add something that would make your gift look like a million dollars. You can add a heart felt note to your gift and let the recipient know how much you value them and how you hope for a better future with them. Better still, you can say it, make a video out of it...etc. These kind of gifts lasts a life time because the memories are endless. People may forget what you give to them but they will never forget how you made them feel. This Christmas why dont you reconnect with an old friend, a colleague or mend a broken bridge. Christmas is more than just shopping and hanging out around the dinner table. It is a time to let go of the gripes of the past and begin again.
Do you know that christmas is a miserable time for some people?  You can choose to have an early christmas for those who dont have anyone to share their love with. If you dont have a place to go, why dont you make your place a home that others can come to  and enjoy the holidays. Christmas like every other day is a time to forget about ourselves and focus on others. The best gifts cant be bought by money. By bringing happiness to others, we are truly enriching our own lives. Happy Christmas and Happy New Year!

What are you going to do differently this Christmas?  I'll like to hear your ideas and stories

The Beauty of Saying No

Many of us are not very comfortable saying no. The reasons vary from insecurity to cultural differences. We have become pros in making everyone but ourselves happy. Unfortunately, we are the ones that suffer the consequences.  If you are the kind of person that helps everyone but receive no help in return, then it is time for you to start learning how to say no. It is okay to say no. No does not have to mean never, it can mean not now or try again. Maybe if we knew why it was important to say no, we might consider practicing it and becoming good at it. Do you know that being able to say no says a lot of about your self-esteem? People who have a low self-esteem are afraid of saying no because they fear loss of a valuable relationship. Saying no means you value yourself,  time and space. It says you respect yourself and you have self-control. People who are able to say no have a lower chance of being taken advantage off. Saying no separates you from the rest of the crowd. No is an important word we should learn to use. When you say no with good intentions, the other party will understand. If they walk away, you have just saved yourself from an abusive relationship.  Learning to say no will help you avoid many unwanted troubles you had no business with in the first place

I must say there are times when we need to be flexible and compromise but that should be a choice we make. It shouldn't be under compulsion or what we think people expect from us. There is no point saying yes and doing it half-heartedly. The  consequences are worse than you declining originally.

I'll like to hear your experiences on how you are dealing with using the word No.

What Great Companies Do - A Lesson from Genencor

I got home yesterday and had  a box waiting for me. Upon opening it, there was a sweatshirt from Genencor (a company I interned at during summer). There was a hand written note that read, " Happy Holidays,  we hope that this sweatshirt will keep you warm! Good luck on your finals and thanks again for spending your summer with us! We miss you! ". 

I was impressed and touched at the same time. My internship was over but yet, they still made me feel valuable for my contributions to the company. I guess it is no surprise that they are one of the best companies to work for in the Bay Area. I wish more companies realize that brains are like hearts and they go where they are valued. The best way to retain talents is not just a great pay check but creating an atmosphere where people can be themselves and know they have a voice in the organization. As an intern at Genencor, I worked on projects that were top priority to the company. I was encouraged to use my talents in creative ways. The best part of my internship was the people I interacted with. From the receptionist desk to the boardroom, you really could not tell who was who. Everyone was valuable and Genecor made it a point to let us know we were appreciated.

When employers appreciate and value their employees, they are on track to moving from good to great. Thanks Genencor for leading the way!

I'll like to hear your experiences of how your organization has shown they care.

Success Is The Best Revenge

Each and everyone one of us at some point in our lives will encounter some unavoidable negative people. We always fall short regardless of whatever we do in their eyes. I have come to realize that there is no point trying to please or explain because they count such as weaknesses or incompetence. The best way to silence your critics is to deliver results. Like water, success does not have any known enemies. Success is colorless and has no boundaries. People may not like you as a person but let the quality of your work be  your voice, by being the best at what you do. There are advantages having critics in our lives, though it never feels like that during the grind. Critics make us stronger and drive us to work harder.

For everyone who has ever told you that you are nothing, amount to nothing and to those who have under estimated and written you off, remember, your success is the best revenge.  Do not let other peoples perception of you become your reality. You and only you are the prophet over your life. Do not give up. You have what it takes.  You can do it. Usain Bolt, the fastest man on earth, was the first man to defend his win with an Olympic gold in 100 and 200M back to back. It had never been done before but he did it. You can be the first too on your own journey.

I'll like to hear about stories and experiences about how you dealt with the critics in your life.

Back to The Basics

It is amazing how the world is changing and becoming a global village. Businesses are growing in leaps and bounds thanks to social media. Social media is transforming our lives, an example was the use of social media during the Arab spring. With all the advantages of technology, there seems to be an area that seems to be suffering. Our communities are the hardest hit. The scary part of all this is that, we don't realize it. These days, we live in the I-generation (all about me).   Before the advent of social media, people made efforts to chat with strangers, say hello to co-workers,  talk to their neighbors or call friends on their birthdays. People dont say good morning anymore and  word "thank you" is becoming rare. We have become engulfed in our tiny worlds and focus more on the latest twits or apps from our Iphones. Interpersonal relationships now seems to be more transactional rather than communal. No wonder while we are advancing in technology, our interpersonal relationships seem to be at an all time low. Take a look at Washington and you understand what I am talking about. It comes as no surprise that companies spend billions on resolving companies yearly. 

  I realized I had become a victim and had resorted to social media in communicating and I was loosing that personal touch with loved ones. I chose to make a conscious effort to put people first and not technology. I dont usually like when I call a company and I am been directed by a machine.  I am a believer in technology because it makes our lives easier, but let us remember that great relationships are never built on the altar of convenience.

I will like to hear about your experiences and how to ensure we don't loose our communities and loves ones to technology

Just Before You Exit

Anyone who works out at the gym knows that whatever muscles you exercise regularly are the ones you see most results in. Similarly, quitting like winning is a skill. Whichever one you exercise more will eventually become a habit. These exercises (quitting or winning) started from when we were little. Remember that  almost impossible math homework that took you hours or days to figure out. What about walking out from a relationship  or someone during a conflict? We are always confronted with two choices either to perserve or give in. It is important to know that   letting go/exiting and quitting are not the same. It is wise to know when to let go rather than waste  precious time or valuable resources.

Is there ever a good time to quit? Zig Ziglar Author of Tough Times Never Last But Tough People Do said "Winners Never Quit and Quitters Never Win". It is important to distinguish between quitting and taking an exit. Taking an exit occurs when you have considered and tried all options and then you come to an objective and informed decision. During a fire alarm, there are usually exit doors for people to escape. The use of these doors are often the last resort. The aftermath of such a decision is relief. Quitting on the other hand does not put all options on the table. The quitter views some options  as too much work and doesn't bother. The aftermath of quitting is often characterized by regrets (woulda-coulda-shoulda).  The quitter never wants to step out of their comfort zone and never knows what could have happened if they did. If you have considered all options and you have to let a job or a person go, you are not a quitter you have just taken an exit.

Winners have a tenacity to them. The difference between the ordinary and the extra-ordinary is the little extra. Winners keep trying new options till they get their desired results. No does not mean never to the winner, it probably means try again or not now. Winners keep keeping at it untill it works. Even when they have to exit, they always keep the door open, for they know they may have to come through that door some time in the future.

I'll like to hear your thoughts or experiences on quitting or letting go? 

What's your Gangnam Style ?

PSY, the South Korean pop artist made history this week. His viral song, Gangnam Style, is the most liked video on youtube with over 1 billion views and counting. It holds the Guinness World Record of most viewed on youtube  . The UN Secretary General, Ban Ki Moon, hailed the song as a "force for world peace". It has inspired many parodies such as the Oregon Duck and the US Navy. Gangnam Style brought Korea to the center of the world. Who would have thought a non english song with cheesy lyrics from South Korea would have reached No 1 in numerous countries including France, Germany, Australia, and the UK. It subsequently won the best video at the MTV Europe Music Awards?

Some might argue about the intellectual content of Gangnam style, but what makes Gangnam style so special? It is not just the lyrics or unique dance moves but the conception of an idea to its execution. The following are my favorite lessons from Gangnam Style:

1. My friend told me the other day "Practice like you would play". A similar military phrase is  "Train like you would fight" -  The dance steps in Gangnam style though looks simply but PSY spent thirty nights trying to figure out and perfect an appropriate dance for his song. PSY put his best into his project.
2. Let yourself loose -   PSY had an opinion about the life style of the people in Gangnam, a city in South Korea and looked for a creative way to tell his story. PSY could have said it was a no brainier or who would care about an unheard district in Seoul, but he did it anyway. He found a way to tell his story in a way that  captured his audience. He showed us that an idea does not have to be too intellectual to win over almost a billion views.  Similarly, what makes you different is what sets you apart in the market place. 
3. Talent is colorless - Over 810 million views!  Gangnam Style was not written in the languages where its currently most celebrated. It was a hit all over the world. This song is a good confirmation that we should always accept our individuality and express our originality. PSY has been interviewed by Ellen Degeneres and several other show hosts
4. Go where you are celebrated - Not everyone is going to like or support your idea and that is okay. When Gangnam was released in Japan, it was met with negativism but the rest of the world had a different opinion. PSY went to where his fans were and did not try to convince his critics. Similarly,  It is important that we do not base quality of our ideas or products on the opinion of others.
5. Success is cumulative  - Champions are not made in the ring but recognized in it. PSY had been working hard but this song made everything worth it.
6. Opportunity favors the prepared - Psy was ready for the world stage and when Scoot Braun, American Talent Manager, who discovered Justin Beiber approached him, he said "Sign me up". 
7. Just Do It - Your idea is probably not a Gangnam Style but there is a dream in you that  wont go away. Your idea is your passport to the world. Why not take that bold step and try it out? Remember to practice like you would play. The backstage is for preparation and the front stage is for manifestation.  One day the world would shine its eyes on you, so you better be prepared when the opportunity knocks.

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